You hear of a friend in need and rush to be by their side. You may reschedule and adjust your plans to make everything work. Later, you find yourself as the person in need. You reject accepting help, even if simply a listening ear? Why? Why do we self-sabotage when it’s our time? There is an ongoing misunderstanding of how we are to operate as human beings. Sacrifice is a beautiful concept but it shouldn’t be to our detriment. You shouldn’t sacrifice your own peace. We must learn to show ourselves the very same compassion that we give to others. It boils down to balance.
Empty Vessel
You’ve heard the old adage about the irony of pouring from an empty vessel. Have you paused to observe the depth of that statement? A vessel’s job is to be filled and pour. Filled and poured. Read that again: filled and poured. What happens if you’re constantly pouring and never refilling? There is a point where you have nothing left to pour, or, in other words, give. And that’s not even the bottom line! The bottom line is that you need to refill yourself. You need to spend time showing compassion to yourself. Recharging when life becomes challenging. Setting boundaries when you need to slow down. Once your vessel is refilled, you are able to contribute outwardly again. It is a cycle that we must lovingly accept.
Meet Your New Friend
Are you friends with yourself? Being comfortable and forging a friendship with yourself is an eye-opening experience. We have an inner voice that can take over at times, criticizing our words and reactions to life experiences.
“Of course, I’m in this situation.”
“I sounded so stupid.”
“Why am I like this?”
Our hyper-critical tone isn’t how we would address a friend. So, why would we allow ourselves to have these inner dialogues? That nurturing conversational tone that we have outwardly should also be a tone we express inwardly. Being kind to yourself and becoming your own friend is a life-changing moment. You deserve to give yourself the quality of love that you give to others.
We are all a work in progress. Breaking our most personal habits that prevent us from loving ourselves and expressing self-compassion can be the start of a beautiful journey. I would love to join you on this journey. If this blog has encouraged you to take that next step to loving yourself, I am offering in-person appointments as well as HIPAA-compliant virtual options. Contact me, today.
SOURCE: https://centerformsc.org/noticing-what-you-need-and-then-asking-for-it-self-compassion-101/
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